Tuesday, February 27, 2007

They Walk Among Us

A woman called me on the phone and said; "I'm going to fax you the
report what is your fax number?"
I gave her the number and then she said; " Would you fax it back to me
when you are done it's my only copy."

They walk among us.

*********************

Some guy bought a new fridge for his house. To get rid of his old
fridge, he put it in his front yard and hung a sign on it saying: "Free
to good home. You want it, you take it."
For three days the fridge sat there without even one person looking
twice at it. He eventually decided that people were too untrusting of
this deal. It looked to good to be true, so he changed the sign to read:
"Fridge for sale $50."
The next day someone stole it.

Caution... They Walk Among Us

*********************

While looking at a house, my brother asked the real estate agent which
direction was north because, he explained, he didn't want the sun waking
him up every morning. She asked, "Does the sun rise in the North?"
When my brother explained that the sun rises in the East, and has for
sometime, she shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with that
stuff."

They Walk Among Us!

*********************
I used to work in technical support for a 24/7 call center. One day I
got a call from an individual who asked what hours the call center was
open. I told him, "The number you dialed is open 24 hours a day, 7 days
a week." He responded, "Is that Eastern or Pacific time?"
Wanting to end the call quickly, I said, "Uh, Pacific."

They Walk Among Us!

*********************

My colleague and I were eating our lunch in our cafeteria, when we
overheard one of the administrative assistants talking about the sunburn
she got on her weekend drive to the shore. She drove down in a
convertible, but "didn't think she'd get sunburned because the car was
moving."

They Walk Among Us!

*********************

My sister has a lifesaving tool in her car it's designed to cut through
a seat belt if she gets trapped.
She keeps it in the trunk...

They Walk Among Us!

*********************

My friends and I were on a beer run and noticed that the cases were
discounted 10%. Since it was a big party, we bought 2 cases.
The cashier multiplied 2 times 10% and gave us a 20% discount....

They Walk Among Us!

*********************

I was hanging out with a friend when we saw a woman with a nose ring
attached to an earring by a chain. My friend said, "Wouldn't the chain
rip out every time she turned her head?"
I explained that a person's nose and ear remain the same distance
apart no matter which way the head is turned...

They Walk Among Us!

*********************

I couldn't find my luggage at the airport baggage area. So I went to
the lost luggage office and told the woman there that my bags never
showed up. She smiled and told me not to worry because she was a trained
professional and I was in good hands. "Now," she asked me, "has your
plane arrived yet?".....

They Walk Among Us!

*********************

While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza
to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like
it cut into 4 pieces or 6.
He thought about it for some time before responding.
"Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6
pieces."

Yep, They Walk Among Us, too.

*********************

They walk among us, AND reproduce!

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1 Comments:

Anonymous Patrick said...

Them walking among us is not the worst part. The worst most horrifying part is that these fuckers vote.

1:12 PM GMT+13  

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